Tolerance, Acceptance & Love (pt 3)

[The following post is part of a brief series on tolerance, acceptance and love - three concepts that are tossed around as much as they are misunderstood in our culture. For healthy relationships it's important to understand the difference. In marriage it's essential. All of the posts in this series come directly from our third study guide which you can purchase here.]

Tolerance Has an Expiration Date

You know the real problem with merely tolerating the differences of others? It’s almost impossible to do that for very long. The tension is just too great. If you believe something to be wrong or unjust or offensive, to accept it is to deny yourself. And denying yourself for any reason other than obedience to a perfectly and infinitely loving God is excruciating. Actually, I find denying myself in obedience to God quite challenging at times. You can forget about me doing it for Julie. I’m just not that strong.

This is why many marriages dissolve over irreconcilable differences.

Funny thing – almost every irreconcilable difference that leads to divorce was actually present in the relationship prior to the wedding day. It’s just most lovebirds find such differences intriguing before marriage, but begin to see them in a different light after they realize they’ll have to endure them every single day, until one of them dies. While others enter marriage naively expecting those dissimilarities to dissipate after they say, “I do.”

Either way, once reality sets in, most couples never resolve to accept those differences. Instead they endeavor to tolerate them, until finally they simply can’t stand it any longer. Fortunately for you, you’re a smart single, so this will not be your story. Determine now to make peace with your loved ones by learning to accept [not merely tolerate] differences. This is what love asks us to do. And as you learn to accept the differences [not the sin] of others, you'll be learning to do the same in marriage. No irreconcilable differences for you.

[The previous is part of a brief series on tolerance, acceptance and love - three concepts that are tossed around as much as they are misunderstood in our culture. For healthy relationships it's important to understand the difference. In marriage it's essential. All of the posts in this series come directly from our third study guide which you can purchase here.]